Rainstorm, again

Last Friday we had a lot of rain, the most we’ve had in the year and a half we’ve lived here. This weekend there’s supposed to be a big storm again. Late last night it started to rain.

I had “Miss T.” my “Tuesday friend” over last night. We had a very good time visiting. We get along so well together. She helped me wind some skeins of cotton yarn into balls, we talked, looked through catalogs, watched Gumby, ate dinner, talked some more… I had a good time but I’m afraid she probably stayed too late, I think it was about 10:30 when she left and she likes to get up at 2:45am.

Today a friend is coming to visit M after work. I hope that goes well.

I just sat E down to thread cheerios onto a string and she can actually DO it! I’m surprised! She’s having a lot of fun. MJ just came downstairs from bed and I handed off mine to him to continue. I had been sitting with E doing it.

I’ve been working on training this week with them and it’s been going fairly well. I’ve also been trying to train myself to keep them closer to me and to involve them in what I’m doing. That part is very difficult for me because my tendancy is to “send them off to play” while I get things done. E especially has been helping me load and unload the dishwasher, and they both helped me make Pumpkin Bread a couple days ago. This is going to take time to “practice” until it becomes second nature to me. I’ve found I get less exasperated with them when they are right there and I’m telling them what I expect them to do, than when they are off “playing” and start to fight and get into trouble. Also having them right there helps me to tell them what to do, because aimlessness when they’re right beside me is annoying.

We’ve played a lot of the “Yes Ma’am Game” and the “Come-Right-Away-And-Say-‘Coming’-When-You’re-Called Game”. Lots of “games”. 😉 And y’know what? It’s spilled over into “real life”. When we do a lot of the “I’m Coming” Game, they start to remember to say that when I call them when we’re not playing.

That “game” especially has been nice because a lot of the time when they’re playing upstairs and I call them, I have no idea whether they heard and are coming or not. So the verbal response helps me to know when I can stop hollering up the stairs.

The “Yes Ma’am Game” conditions them to respond right away with a “yes ma’am” and DO what I said, almost without thinking about it. It’s kind of like Simon Says. They get used to obeying when I say random, various commands, (some of them make no sense) because in real scenarios sometimes my commands don’t make sense to a child. I want their first response to be “Yes Ma’am” and obey, instead of stand there, evaluate my command and decide whether they think it’s logical and/or worth obeying.

We have by no means “arrived”. It’s a constant thing. But I hope that conditioning myself to respond to them will help us all to be happier.

Here is a list I have of things that I have been / hope to work on:

~Greeting peopleSometimes my 4yo will refuse to aknowledge and return other people’s greetings and it’s very annoying/rude. We can role-play and pretend scenarios where they are interacting with people.

~Being happy with getting smaller portions or noneWho wants a crybaby when you’re dishing out treats and one child doesn’t get any/as much as another person?

~Sitting quietlyWe really need to work on this one. I’ve been doing it a little this week but so far it hasn’t gone off too well. They cry and act like it’s a great punishment.

~Comingquickly, and right away when called. Also to say “I’m coming” as soon as they hear me call.

~How to act properly in a store, library, etc.More role playing

~How to play with a babyE especially needs more practice being gentle around C. MJ needs to learn to stay out of C’s face.

~How to wash handsProperly

~How to brush teeth

~How to be happy with what you haveContentment training

~No interruptingThis is a big one!

~”Stop” training This hasn’t been going as well as I’d like, but we’ll just keep practicing. It seems like MJ needs time to process my command or something. He’s not disobeying or purposely going further, but he generally runs/walks a few more steps before the command sinks in. This is a very important one… their lives could hinge on their prompt obedience of this command.

~How to accept “no” Without whining, crying, complaining or pitching a fit!

~How to fold clothes, load dishwasher, clean windows, etcTeaching them how to properly perform some regular household duties

~Not touching things

~How to share

~How to stay in your room, on your bed, in the chair, etc

~Yes Ma’am/Sir training

~Table mannersI’ve been making an effort at this one. They usually didn’t eat with us at the table so I didn’t realize how atrocious they are until we have company or go somewhere for dinner.

~How to clean up after yourself

~Noise controlBe seen but not heard 🙂

~Sign languge interpretation & obedienceI don’t know “sign language” but I’m talking the basics such as finger to the lips, “come here” motion, shaking my head or wagging my finger at them… lots of times when I’m on the phone and do these they know full well what I mean but won’t obey unless I verbally tell them.

~Phone trainingHow to be quiet while I’m on the phone

~Putting socks and shoes onThe right feet!

I’m sure there’s a lot more but that’s the list that is up on my fridge right now. So you see I have my work cut out for me!

Now they want a story so I’m going to go indulge them!
JJ

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8 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    Sara said,

    Hi there – I found your blog through the T2CHK website. I just wanted to say hi and that I totally relate to what you’re saying about training yourself and involving the kids with what you’re doing. Mine is still a little young, but I can tell already that my nature is to get things done my way (the right way :)) rather than take the time to involve kids.

    Anyhow a long message to say hi. The rain wasn’t too bad either! (I think it’s a nice change!)

  2. 2

    Hi Sara,

    You’re my “neighbor”, aren’t you? We should get together sometime!

    It’s definately a hot cocoa day!
    JJ

  3. 3

    MissT said,

    There was no 2:45am for me this a.m.!! I slept in ’til 4:20! I had a great time too. MJ stole my heart!

  4. 4

    That was so cute! I loved the way he put the camping stuff “in the trunk” and then always made a little noise to signify that he closed it. haha!

  5. 5

    Sara said,

    Yes, I am your “neighbor” 🙂 It would be nice to get together sometime. Email me – I think you should have it since it’s required that I put it in here. 🙂

  6. 6

    Jenny said,

    Amy,

    I printed your list for reference. I have thought of these things, but have never put them in a concise, clear list. Thanks for the rescource! 🙂

  7. 7

    I’m glad the list is helpful to someone! Let me know how you like your new place once you settle in, Jenny!

  8. 8

    Could you lay out what your yes ma’am/sir game looks like?


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